Saturday, April 29, 2006

Perfect Complements

Aren't you glad that God knows who will go perfectly with who, and he brings them together? Wes and I are so opposite each other that you'd think we would drive each other crazy. Well, sometimes we do. But that's beside the point. We make up and everything's good again. Most of the time, we balance each other out. Like last night.

We dropped the kids off at Gym Night with Greater Vancouver Baptist Church, then headed across town a bit to pick up something I had asked for on Freecycle. Now, when Wes is going somewhere unfamiliar, he looks it up on Mapquest, maps his route, notices cross streets, side streets, nearest intersections, and prints out the little map with driving directions. He is like most men and hates to get lost. He even hates missing a street and having to turn around and go back one block. I, on the other hand, look at the map, get a general idea of where the place is, make a note of the places where we need to turn, and away I go, usually without a map, cell phone, or telephone number to call in case I can't find it. A 30-minute drive across town takes Wes 20 minutes; it takes me an hour, if I find the place right away. But I enjoy the scenery, and I've found some really neat places when I've gotten lost.

But back to last night. On the way to the Freecyle find, he asked several questions such as how far is it to the turn - I don't know. What major intersection is it near - well, I know you don't go past Kingsway. I think. What is the street before the one we turn on - I don't know. Tension is rising. To make matters worse, there is road construction. He tells me to watch streets and he'll watch construction. I did, and we went straight to the apartment with no incident. I always pull through . . . well, most of the time, anyway.

Then we go to a park. It's one we like, and we've always gone in a certain part of it, the first area coming from where we live. Last Monday, when I was out rambling around with my quilt tops, I walked the sea wall and came to that park from the opposite direction, and then later that day I saw another entrance to that park from the street and assumed that was the same place I'd walked to earlier. So I told Wes that we could go a little farther and just walk around a little corner and be on the sea wall. Well. It was a little farther down than I thought. We walked and walked and finally came to the sea wall and began our walk over to our favorite coffee shop. Wes made the comment, as I was apologizing yet again for not knowing exactly where to turn in and that I had once again underestimated the distance from point A to point B, that I could turn a 30-minute drive into a 3-hour trip. Ah, yes, but I enjoy that trip!

I'm going somewhere with this. I told you I enjoy the trip! LOL I was only partly joking when I told him that God had given us to each other because we need each other. I take my time and usually don't get too bent out of shape if I miss a turn or get totally lost and have to start over. I'm a sightseer; I like new places. I take the time to smell the roses; he sees thorn bushes that happen to have flowers on them. Wes goes from point A to point B in the shortest amount of time and distance possible. Turn not to the right hand nor to the left is his motto. I'm Tigger to his Eeyore (you don't know just how well that describes us - he is Eeyore!) So my theory is that God put us together so that Wes would slow down and see the roses in life . . . and I would get where I need to go . . . on time.

Most couples we know are like that. He's a talker and she's quiet. He's a homebody and she likes to get out. He prefers quiet and she's got the radio on all the time. He's organized and she's chaotic. Is it that way with you and your husband? I really love to get to know people and see how God paired up opposites so that one's weakness is the other's strength. Ecclesiastes 4:9,10 says, "Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow . . ." We've found that so true in our marriage; how about you?


  1. Yes! Oh boy, you had me giggling through your story. I'm STILL chuckling. Tim and I are very different. I will give someone the benefit of the doubt a million times. He suspects you from the beginning and if you mess up...well, of course you messed up. lol That's what he expected. I like quiet, he always has something going. I like things neat...well, he does too but he is a (ahem) "collector" and I am a throw-away'er. I take great pleasure in a nice yard...he doesn't get it. LOL It's grass for heaven's sake. We agreed before we married that the yard would be my responsibility. I just didn't know we'd be getting such a big one. (Can you tell I'm exhausted from finishing the mowing today?)

    I think he keeps me from being quite so naive and I help him not to be quite so suspicious. That's probably pretty healthy.
    Ok...I could go on but I think I've done enough damage. :)

  2. Oh, Lisa . . .I can identify with the suspicious vs. trusting. I just love people - my spiritual gift is the gift of mercy - and Wes likes people . . . kinda . . . sorta. He often tells our church family that God gave me to him to help him be kinder and gentler! I hope that doesn't scare them! But I know what you mean.

  3. I bet it makes them want to take good care of you!

  4. Ken and I are also COMPLETE opposites! What a 'fun' marriage (is 'iron sharpening iron' fun??LOL!!) it's been ! Seriously; we are so glad in that it's given us the ability to grow in appreciating the other's uniqueness. Don't feel too bad about that 'walk along the sea wall'....I parked our car once (we live in Queens, N.Y.) and AVOWED I knew where it was when we headed out one day for family fun. Had us walking in the wrong direction for oh, a good 15 minutes!! However, I WILL stop and ask for directions when we're not sure of where we are!!LOL!! Yeah...everything from music to movies and the like. I wouldn't trade this relationship for the world!! Thanks for sharing~smile~

  5. Oh yeah my husband and I are opposites!! He is the quiet one and I'm not. He is the patient one and I'm not. He is the messy one and I'm the neat and organized one. But it works out great. We've been married for going on 20 yrs. and so far its worked out pretty well. What I love most about a marriage is that when he is down and discouraged I seem to be at a point where I'm spiritually uplifted at that time and the other way around when I'm down and discouraged. Isn't it wonderful how God designed us to be like that for one another. We also pair up pretty good with our spiritual gifts. His is exhortation and mine is mercy. So while I'm feeling the other person's pain and able to sympathize...he is able to encourage and exhort them. It has been a blessing and help to others more times than I can count. God is just so great!!

  6. Eileen, we traveled for almost 3 years to raise support for our ministry here, and Wes kind of made me his navigator. I am good at reading a map, but not when we've hit a traffic jam in an unfamiliar city and he wants to know an alternate route . . . yesterday, if not sooner! LOL The worst times we had were when I got mad because he got upset that I couldn't figure out a different while he was driving past all the exits to go the different ways!

    Sis. Julie, it is amazing that rarely are we both down at the same time. We've pulled each other up many times!

  7. Susan, I had to laugh when I read this. My husband and I are definitely opposites in every way, except how we think and feel about moral and spiritual issues. This post got me thinking about all the ways we are opposite and I really did have to laugh. Thanks!

  8. Neil and I are so different, its amazing! But I am the navigator in the fam.

    If we were too much alike, we'd probably kill each other!

    Thank God for opposites!


  9. What a delightful post!

    My husband and I are opposite on some things but we've also grown alike because of being together for 14 years.

    Some of our differences are he likes to be the driver and I don't like to drive so it works out really well!

    He loves to go to new restaurants and I'd rather go to ones I'm familiar with.

    I am too trusting and he has really good discernment.

    We compliment each other really fact we were watching something on tv the other night about 2 male best friends and he turned to me and told me that I was his BEST friend! My heart just melted. (o: He's mine as well.


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